Vincent Gallo

Scraggly looking actor musician guy.

Buffalo '66 (1998) -- A movie that's interesting in spite of itself, probably because Gallo (or someone) was smart enough to get Ben Gazzara, Anjelica Houston, and especially Christina Ricci to be in it with him. Certainly there's nothing likeable about the Vincent Gallo character until the last five minutes of the movie. The whole thing feels like it was written by a lonely teen boy (the kind that still obsess about third grade crushes), right down to the lonely teen boy's wet dream of Christina Ricci herself, one of those incredibly cute and not typically good-looking girls with big boobs and a sharp and winning personality who always show up to save the day, even though the "protagonist" is constantly cruel to her and spouting the usual stuff about evil girls, eventually cradling him while he's in the fetal position. To keep your attention, Gallo farts around with some different stylistic devices, like having videos from the past zoom in on the screen or shining stage spotlights on people while they're doing songs or dances, which are nice as standalones even if they don't do anything for the story. In the end, the best explanation I have for why I liked this movie, even though it is so potentially annoying, is that Christina Ricci has magical soothing properties produced by the fact that her entire image is made of spheres--just like Mickey Mouse--and she looks beautiful as ever here. To give Gallo some credit, he did keep the movie more or less tight and focused, something he unfortunately wouldn't do at all for his next movie. B

The Brown Bunny (2003) -- The only interesting thing about this movie is that Chloe Sevigny sucks Vincent Gallo's dick. So if you're interested in seeing semi-famous people doing real sex acts in a non-porn (that is to say, it's not put out by Vivid Video or whatever), fast-forward to that part. If you're interested in seeing more famous people having more passionate and loving sex, rent Pamela and Tommy Lee: Hardcore and Uncensored. On top of the sex bits, you'll get a more interesting movie. Funny that the Pam and Tommy Lee video, in just being a home movie shot for themselves with a cam-corder, is a hundred times more entertaining, engaging, and plot-driven than The Brown Bunny, a made-to-be-seen "real" movie. If you don't fast-forward -- and really, you shouldn't even bother doing that unless you're also interested in Vincent Gallo bad-mouthing Chloe, then pushing her away and zipping up his boner in a stupid man sort of way (and, by the way, the movie in fast-forward looks very much like a movie in pause) -- you get to see at least an hour of Gallo driving around in his car (point of view shot, and even more boring than it sounds), ten minutes of him stopping at gas stations, and another ten minutes of him making out with a druggy-looking Cheryl Tiegs for no real reason. At the end of the movie, you get to hear him whining about Chloe doing drugs while she was pregnant and killing their baby (boo fucking hoo, you shit). This sort of movie would be unforgivable even if a misogynistic talentless seventeen-year-old boy made it, but here it is. F